You argue but there is way more cooperation to make the dynamic between the two of you work when you really sit and consider it all.
The have separate ambitions goals which you help each other achieve AND you have collective goals to grow yourselves as a couple or family.
There is trust. Like real trust. If he is going out with the boys you know that’s where he really is. If she tells you that he is just a friend, you don’t stalk his Facebook looking for incriminating pictures…or go through her phone.
You can speak your mind freely without judgement. Some people avoid speaking just because of how their feelings were shot down in past relationships. If you can’t express yourself, your relationship may not be a safe harbor.
When you do argue you are able to let it roll off your back. You understand that one disagreement isn’t as important as being a unit. SO you cool off (quickly) and figure out how to move forward.
I guess #5 ties into compromising. No relationship is successful without a lot of compromise. On both sides. I no longer fight with my wife about the color of the curtains in the kitchen if she wants silver drapes…okay fine. Just don’t put them in my man cave (it’s more of an empty room with books but it’s MY empty room).
Space is given when needed. I personally don’t believe in “breaks.” If you need a break then you might as well move on if you’re with me. But I do believe in giving time to so the other person can re-energize and do some self caring. This includes going to the gym separately when needed, reading, meditation, shopping alone.
There is equality. I’m a pretty opinionated/focused person. But I can’t afford to treat anyone without respect and not listen to other opinions.
You give. That’s it. I used to give, when I was dating in order to influence the girl or demonstrate that the type of salary I have. I would give really expensive gifts…so you know I’m not broke or cheap. Now I give not expecting anything in return. It’s just fun to give. I find that giving cannot exist where there is no love.